Can you have an Instagram worthy relationship?

Do you ever scroll through those pictures on Instagram of the couples that are just perfect?

The date nights are candle light that come along with a gorgeous dozen roses. The girl has perfectly done hair and makeup in her trendy outfit snugging her slim body while eating pasta and cheesecake for dessert, AND this is just Wednesday! Forget what happens on Saturday.

Beyond the dates the couple radiates love and passion. Scrolling the ‘gram you get a tiny peak into their perfect love story. You lock your phone’s screen it goes black and your left starting at yourself in that small screen in your hand left with the reality of your life and relationship.

You probably sigh and wonder where you went wrong to not have that love and that life. You yearn for the candle lit dinners, surprise bouquets of flowers and chocolate, and the never-ending proclamations of love.

Can you have an Instagram worthy relationship yourself?

I believe you can – I don’t think it’s out of reach.

Instagram isn’t the real world 

The first thing to remember is that Instagram isn’t the real world. It may be a brief snapshot of real life or it may be completely fabricated. I think that as a society we love pictures because it is a pause in time. You get to remember the good moment. But more than that you get to create what that moment looks like in the picture.

Even videos are often short and constructed. There is more to the story than what you get to see when you scroll through your feed.

Take a look at your life, at your relationship, do you have moments that if you saw from the outside would like a picture-perfect moment? Maybe your hair isn’t perfect and its not below a sea of stars but you have that feeling of pure love.

Savor those moments. Write them down in a journal. You probably have more of them than you think. Create a real-life feed of your own Instagram worthy moments.

Pictures don’t mean happiness

In your parent’s house there is probably a family photo filled with smiling faces in coordinating outfits. A visitor would see a loving happy family. You probably know there was a lot of yelling and rushing to get ready for the photo. Your younger sibling was stomping around voicing their pure hatred for the chosen outfit. Mom may have even had to threaten everyone in her mom voice that if they didn’t smile for this photo so help them.

The picture in that moment doesn’t equate to happiness. Your family has their happy moments. But that photo doesn’t create it. The memories of late-night dance parties or adventures on camping trips in the summer those are what creates the happiness.

You can probably find many examples of you in pictures that depict a happy face when you were anything but in that moment.

Just because you don’t have endless photos to scroll through of your relationship doesn’t mean that it isn’t filled with just as much love and happiness as the ones that you see.

You could already have the perfect Instagram relationship

What do you think of when you are thinking of an Instagram worthy relationship?

There is a definition floating around in your head of what you think the perfect Instagram relationship is.

Is it about the looks of the couple? Or is it about what they do with or for each other?

Figure out what part of it you are looking at then why you are focusing there. Once you have determined what and why you get to decide if that is what you want to keep doing. The importance you are putting on that aspect of the relationship maybe isn’t what you want to hold as important in your own relationship.

The only person that gets to decide what is important to you and in your relationship is you. 

Stop looking at Instagram

Instagram is not the best source of figuring out what your relationship should look like. It is a construed picture of what other people think that strangers want a relationship to look like.

When something is causing a strain in your relationship or how you are looking at your relationship removing it is a quick fix. I would not say that it is an end all be all if you enjoy Instagram for other reasons and find you want it part of your life.

Until you work on your thoughts around what you are seeing on Instagram you should step away and then slowly introduce it back into your life. If, being without the gram for a while causes pure stress and anxiety maybe just unfollow the accounts causing angst in your relationship.

Don’t put it on Instagram

Relationships are personal. Really keep that journal of the perfect relationship moments. Even the smallest of ones. The cold morning embraces when he could have just stayed cozy in bed. A brief moment in the throws of a hectic day where you connect.

The moments don’t have to be extravagant candle lit dinners.

All the small tiny parts of our life that your partner is part of makes up that perfect relationship. Of course, there are going to be low moments. Those low moments make the highs possible. They can even create those highs. Talking through a tense moment or getting through a hard time.

Those are the real moments, the real-life moments, that create your Instagram perfect relationship.

Final Thoughts – 

Don’t let shiny objects bring you away from the realness happening around you every day.

When you were a little girl watching princess movies you weren’t dreaming of a feed filled with pictures. Your thoughts danced around a prince charming who would know how to love you and be with you filling your life with love and happiness.

Society has been changed with social media. Some argue for the better others quite the opposite.
No one can judge the effect it has on your life. Know the part it plays in your life – if you like it keep at it, if you don’t make the change.

There is no reason the relationship you are in can’t be your perfect Instagram worthy relationship.

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