It is time to set those New Year’s resolutions for 2020. (I can’t believe it’s almost 2020!)
Alright you do have a little bit of time before the new year so don’t quit on 2019 yet. But, I do think it is important that you begin thinking about the new year.
Have you been thinking about what New Year’s resolution you want to come true?
Maybe you want to exercise or eat better.
Maybe you want to improve your relationship with someone.
Maybe you want to spend more time with family.
Maybe you want to spend less time watching TV.
Whatever it is you want your New Year’s resolution to be should have meaning to you.
We always start out with the right intention – to make something better in our life!
Who doesn’t want things to be better?
BUT, have you ever truly stuck to a resolution that you have set? If, you are like many people then the answer is no. A lot of people just hope that their New Year’s resolutions come true rather than making their resolutions come true.
Resolutions are not wishes it takes a bit of conscious effort to make them happen. Don’t worry if you have not made a resolution come true in the past.
A tiny fraction of people sticks to their resolution, like 8% tiny. That is a lot of people not keeping with their desire to make their life better. As the year gets further on that amount starts to go down as well.
The good news is you can be part of the small group who sets a New Year’s resolution and makes it come true regardless of what has happened in the past.
So, how are you going to make this year different than the last? From preparation to practice this post will give you the steps to make your New Year’s resolution come true.
Prep!
No one who has never gone scuba diving is going scuba diving without preparation – getting the gear, taking training classes, checking the weather, etc. We often forget about this when we do things that aren’t as task specific.
So, if you are new to achieving your resolution then you need to prepare!
The first place to start preparing is with your mind. Your mind will be the key to making your New Year’s resolutions come true.
Your mind is one of your most powerful tools you have access to. It is crazy what you can accomplish with it. However, sometimes it goes rogue and all that motivation, passion, enthusiasm is no longer there and you are slipping into your old ways.
The brain can be tricky. It will make whatever you are searching for to be true. If, you are focusing on failing to keep your resolution it is going to find proof of that. Think happy thoughts may be a cliché but…think happy thoughts!
You have the control over you mind.
(If, you want one on one help keeping your mind in check you can access that here.)
Thinking of You
The thoughts that you have of yourself heavily impact the results you have in your life. You have to be kind to yourself. Beating yourself up when you make a mistake or talking negatively to yourself will certainly keep you from being able to make your New Year’s resolution come true.
Start paying attention to how you are talking to yourself about yourself. An easy to do this is if you wouldn’t say it to someone you love then you probably shouldn’t be saying it to yourself.
Now that your mind is right it is time to figure out what other obstacles you may encounter.
Overcome those Obstacles
Think of all the obstacles you may encounter. Every single one. Then takes those obstacles and turn them into a plan. Know how you will handle each one.
Obstacles to consider will be:
- Time
- Other’s opinions
- Finances
- Unplanned events
- Temptations
Remember that if you succumb to an obstacle that it isn’t time to quit. You can always get right back on track! No beating yourself up about it.
You have already done so much to make sure your New Year’s resolution comes true once the new year hits. There is still one very important thing to do before the new year – picking what resolution you want!
Set it but don’t forget it
Setting your New Year’s resolutions needs to happen before New Year’s Eve. The fact that you are reading this post means that you are already thinking about it which is great!
When you make decisions before the actual event you use a part of your brain that helps you make better decisions. You make it with a clearer view.
Think about a time when you did not prepare for a decision and had to make it on the spot. Would that have been the same decision you would have made if you had time to consider it? More than likely not.
Don’t let that be the case with your New Year’s resolution. Take the time to set a New Year’s Resolution ahead of time.
Set intentional Resolutions
Things to remember
There are things to remember when you are setting your New Year’s resolution.
- Resolutions are not bucket lists
You do not need to fill a page with all of things you want to do this year. That would be something to do on a goal list. But, even with a goal list we whittle it down. You are setting yourself up for failure if you try to do too much or something too big.
Bucket list items are generally not geared towards resolutions. Resolutions are about changing something about you or what you do that is currently not what you want.
- The bigger is not the better
When many people think about resolutions they think of something big, something that will majorly change their life. However, the further away a resolution is from your current situation the less likely you will be able to keep it.
I like to think of a resolution as a way to enhance my life. Something that will have an impact but is not too big to tackle. Resolutions are meant to alter an undesirable trait or behavior. Keep that in mind when you are trying to decide what resolution to set. I would save the larger items to use as a goal. Goals you are able to plan out over the course of an appropriate amount of time. Generally, people want to see the effects of resolutions pretty quick.
- Other people do not have to understand it.
You can absolutely veer from the standard or traditional resolutions. The only person that the resolution has to make sense to is you. No one else has to understand it or like it.
Bonus tip: You don’t even need to tell other people what your resolution is!
Setting a resolution
Sit down and make a list of everything you may want to set as a resolution.
After you have this list written out take some time to review it. Cross things off that don’t stand out to you as something you really want to do. While you are doing this keep in mind not wanting to do something is very different than cross something off because you believe it will be hard.
Our brains can be tricky and tell us to avoid something because it is new or challenging. Watch what your brain does while going through the list. Where does it jump to when you read one of your resolutions.
Then I would really encourage you to narrow it down to one main resolution. Focusing on one will allow you to give more energy and pay more attention. It also won’t feel as overwhelming.
A way to narrow down your list is to think of your life being made up of various areas. Those areas may be career, money/finances, healthy, spirituality/faith, relationships, home/environment, etc. Pick an area that you would like to target growth in. That should help determine which resolution you should choose.
There is no right resolution to have. The only thing that matters is that you want to make that change and it means something to you. Your life will not mirror any one else’s life. Make this decision based off of what you want to see. People are going to have an opinion on it and that is okay, just let them.
How to be successful in the New Year
You can’t change overnight
Look, we would all love to wake up one morning and have what we would deem to be the perfect life. If, it were that easy we wouldn’t have to set a resolution. New Year’s resolutions are meant to bring you into the new year with a positive change you want to see that year.
Emphasis on year. That means you have time to progress to the change. It will take work to make it part of your life or part of you. Maybe your resolution is not to yell when you get angry or not reacting to another emotion you have. Even once you bring your awareness to make this change there is going to be times you don’t do it.
There is no end
Changing and maintaining the change takes consistent active work. Even if that change becomes second nature to you there is going to become a time it is hard and you have to work to maintain it.
A great example of this is when we choose to make changes to the way we eat. One common resolution is to stop eating sweets. In the beginning it can be very challenging but as time goes on it becomes much easier and you don’t even want to eat sweets anymore. Then the holiday seasons come around and you partake because it’s the holidays and before you know it sweets are back to being a regular part of your life.
This is one tiny example of how the things we resolved to change and have made those changes will need to be paid attention to in order to maintain it. You probably aren’t thrilled about there not being an end but I’m not here to tell you what you want to hear. I’m here to get you the results you want.
Meet yourself where you are
That resolution to work out everyday doesn’t have to mean you are spending hours in the gym especially in the beginning. Set an amount of time that you will be able to stick to even if that is five minutes. Once you are able to do that with ease continue to build up your time.
The commitment and consistency is what you are trying to instill.
Know its going to be hard
Acknowledging that in order to keep the resolution things will be hard will allow you to prepare for it. When you meet a bump in the road or have a negative feeling it won’t mean you give up on your resolution.
Become Accountable
Write your resolution down. That always makes things more real for me rather than keeping them in my brain. Then put your resolution somewhere you have to see it constantly. It will keep it fresh in your mind. Keep yourself accountable to it.
You can also tell someone your resolution. I would only do this if you think the person will be helpful. But this is a good way to stay accountable. Check in with each other on a regular basis to see how you are progressing.
Final Thoughts
Resolutions don’t have to be something you give up on. With a little prep…and a bit more work you can make it happen. Let’s make those resolutions come true!
Send me an email to melissa@melissagolas.com and let me know what your resolution is this year!
